I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
