standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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