Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
