Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
