I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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