Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
When did angry sex become our thing?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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