dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
