I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
