Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
