piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Can Purell be used as lube?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
handjob tips. give me some.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I wear drunk well.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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