Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
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his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
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He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
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