..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
