She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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