i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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