I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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