I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
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