Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize