i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
