there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
