With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Randomize
