Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
Randomize
