My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
