Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize