just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize
