I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
