I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
How's work?
Spinning.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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