I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize