So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize