I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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