Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
