We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize