is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize