why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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