omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
