and next time when you feel me up, do it right
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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