that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
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