her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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