I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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