take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
