I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Randomize
