that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Randomize
