ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
