He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
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i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
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You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..