i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
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The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize