we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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