You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize