Don't make out with my wife yet
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
