if you like me you must not know who I am
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
