hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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