Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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